EFT For Lovelessness

I feel like a victim, like I have no control of my life. It’s hard to feel that way, and I would like to change, but I feel deeply conflicted and helpless.

I deeply and completely love and accept myself, I forgive myself and anyone else who may have contributed to this.

I feel all these emotions: despair, unloved, unsupported, miserable, longing, unappreciated, defeated, longing to be loved, feeling like an outsider. It’s may be natural that I feel this way based on my upbringing and my past baggage, may be I even have a right to feel that way, but it doesn’t really help me. And I don’t want to keep referencing the past because I dont’ want my past to dictate my future.

May be I dont know what is love, love is a concept that I see on tv and in other people’s lives. I am longing for love, but I don’t believe in love, there is no love for me. I am a victim. I am angry with _____ for not loving me, I have a right to feel like that. I need to be loved the way I need to be loved.

But thinking this way only keeps me in suffering. May be I need to choose a different way of being so that I can be happy, and so that my children can have a happier childhood than me. While it is easier to be unhappy and blame other people for my pain, I now choose to be courageous.

I choose to take charge of my emotions and my life, even though I still feel like a victim, I am willing to try. I now choose SERENITY, PEACE OF MIND, WISDOM, AUTHENTICITY, AWAKENING, EQUANIMITY, COURAGE, JOY, GRATITUDE, WONDERMENT, STRENGTH, HARMONY, ABUNDANCE, CONTENTMENT. I now choose THE HIGHEST TRUTH, THE GREATEST LOVE and THE DEEPEST JOY.

May be I have chosen to experience lovelessness, may be now I can choose to experience the opposite of that. I choose to see that the universe supports me, the sun, the sky, the earth, the food that I eat …… the look in my son’s eyes when he laughs and cries…. I am not alone in the world.

I now choose to know that I am a divine child of the universe, I am made of love, I am made of nothing but love. The energy of love gives life and energizes everything. I now choose to be in touch with the DEEPEST TRUTH within me. Underneath the personality, the negative thoughts, the painful emotions is the ESSENCE of who I am. I am a river of consciousness flowing into the the sea of all existence. The experiences I have are the experiences that I choose to have. Because I have choices, I can now choose to have a different experience of life. I now choose SERENITY, PEACE OF MIND, WISDOM, AUTHENTICITY, AWAKENING, EQUANIMITY, COURAGE, JOY, GRATITUDE, WONDERMENT, STRENGTH, HARMONY, ABUNDANCE, CONTENTMENT. I now choose THE HIGHEST TRUTH, THE GREATEST LOVE and THE DEEPEST JOY. All is well in my world.

EFT for letting go of the ‘I am a victim’ paradigm

Ten of Swords: bottoming out, victim mentality, martydom

Sometimes we just find it very hard to heal. We go around in circles, and find it hard to break free. We’ve had years of illness, bad luck, and maybe a victim mentality. The same reality repeats, again and again and again.

In this particular case, K had major triggering event in childhood she named ‘total devastation’. These statements were crafted to allow her to see that she somehow perpetuated this reality, stretched the moment and clung to it. She chose it, and therefore have the power to choose to change it. It’s about letting go of the idea of ‘I’ being the victim, ‘I’ being alone and in need while everyone else is having a good time. It was designed to be slightly provocative ,to engage the ego and dig out emotions which may be hidden. Also it’s meant to suggest to the user to let the ‘victim’ go, but in the event that he or she isn’t quite ready yet, it doesn’t push the envelope. Caution: This can only be used with skill and compassion, and isn’t meant for everyone. Please use with care.

If you are new to EFT and tapping please check the section on EFT Basics for the basic tapping technique.

1. Repeat 3 times: “I need to hang on to this ‘total devastation’. So that I can blame someone else. So that I can hold the world responsible for my misery. So I don’t have to take responsibility for myself. The world owes me, so-and-so owes me, they are responsible for my suffering, my pain.

2. just once: I’ll show them, I’ll make them sorry for hurting me, I’m going to be really, really sick, and then they’ll be sorry. They’ll be sorry for me, and give me attention, and love me. Poor me, look at me, negative attention is better than no attention. I need this ‘total devastation’ to protect me, from having to take responsibility, because I know I’m not good enough. I can’t take care of myself. I’m only a child inside, I can’t cope. I need you to take care of me. I need to be nurtured. I need to be loved. I need. I want. Nobody wants me. There’s only me in my world. I’m all alone in my world of me. I need to make people notice me.

3. Repeat 2 times: Even though I still need this piece of juicy melodrama, I’m now ready to think about letting it go. The more I think of ‘me’, ‘poor me’, ‘woe is me’, the more I box ‘myself’ into my lonely world of one. If only I can find another way of being, I just might be ready to let go. If only I can choose to be calm and confident; to include other people in my world, I might start to think about letting my melodrama go. If only it’s possible to let go of this siege mentality and enjoy being humble, selfless, and free. If only I knew what it feels like to be loving without expectations, to be open and giving, I might be willing to let the ‘victim’ go. If I was strong enough to have compassion and wisdom, and think more of others than of me, I will let the ‘victim’ rest, I will let my ‘I’ rest. I might be able to find the courage to let go of the river bank and flow into the river of life. But for now, I’m ok being who I am, and where I am. I have free choice.”